"I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd Cause these words are my diary screamin out loud And I know you'll use them however you want to"

Conversations with Mom

I walk into the kitchen

Mom (from the couch in front of the TV): Eat some of the lettuce I brought today.

Me: Whaaaat?

Mom: I brought some lettuce today and you have to eat some with your dinner.

Me: But I already have a whole box of lettuce I have to eat!

Mom: But this is good lettuce.

Me: All lettuce is the same.
(I walk over to look at the lettuce mom is talking about)

Mom: This lettuce tastes very good. (still from the couch)

Me: This looks like normal lettuce to me.

Mom: It's very tasty because I chopped it myself.

Me: Mooooooom! (I sit down and start to eat the lettuce).

The moral: Mothers win most of the time.