Sunday, April 23, 2006

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have And cannonball into the water


I read something at the beginning of this past week and have had it in the back of my mind, measuring my life experiences this week to it. Some of what I had on my mind this week was clarified when I read a commencement address given by Steve Jobs in 2005.
Warning: this post is lengthy, but I think anyone who reads it will be provoked to think and be inspired like I was.

For those who are not aware, this month is the 30th anniversary of the first Apple computer. And for those of you who aren't aware of who Steve Jobs is- he is a co-founder of Apple Computers and current CEO of Apple and Pixar Animation Studios. I read a commencement address that he gave to the Stanford grads last year. Very inspiring. It's funny how we 'know' people because of what they do and what they appear to be. Reading his commencement address reminded me that there is always a history and journey behind every appearance. Also, on a personal note, when you truly search for answers, you receive them in the most amazing and unexpected ways.

I have included parts of the address here that related to some of my questions/thoughts/experiences (in italics) this week:

The way in which you come into the world is significant:

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. ...The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on.
Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.


What/who incites your passion?:

.........I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started?

The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.
During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick.

....You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.


Nothing is worth more than this day:

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right."... for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer.... I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

... Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.


To read Steve Jobs' commencement address to the Stanford graduating class of 2005 in full, click below:


The first Apple computer
circa 1976.

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